Workplace WTF?

The workplace...why the foolishness? The working relationship is a delicate one. It's incredibly unique in that the upside and downside of co-worker dynamics can actually impact your livelihood. It can be extremely difficult to feel disrespected, undervalued or unappreciated, while giving the 100 % expected, in order to validate and maintain your position. The heap of hell you have to grapple with can be quite unbearable, but until you you find or create something better, you're stuck, so here's how to make the most of it.

First understand that mental illness is REAL. Some people (like the ones you work with) may not even realize that they have mental health challenges, disguised as being described as having "an odd personality" or "strange". Poor behavior isn't limited to just possible mental illness. Ridiculous co-worker behavior can derive from that person's adverse reaction to a past or present experience that triggers them to go so far as to write you up, when all that you had was a miscommunication problem that could have easily been resolved with a verbal warning or a conversation. Some people are hungry for control because they don't have control at home or in their own personal lives, so it spills over into the workplace. They micromanage because that's the only way they can feel validated or eliminate the perceived threat that you pose.

I've always found it helpful to meet people where they are. For example, if you're a co-worker with "stupid" or "irrational" ways, then I treat you the same way I would treat a stranger on the street who isn't smart or makes ridiculous decisions. I ignore ignorance and figure out alternate ways around that person's craziness, so that I don't get sucked in to their dysfunction. Treat these personality types the same way that you would treat a child. When you know what to expect from people, you can adjust and make moves accordingly. When childishness rears its ugly head... be the parent. Be clear and articulate your position on the matter at hand in a direct way, while maintaining a tone of kindness. Maintain your ground with the understanding that your co-workers are people that may have issues that have nothing to do with you personally. It feels personal of course, but you have to make strategic moves so that you don't go down with what may be a burning ship.

Think of your co-worker as an experiment. Note their behavioral patterns. Do they always blame others when their ass is on the line? Do they take credit for success only and never admit when they've made a mistake? Do they delegate work that they should be doing? Do they purposely schedule meetings during times that may be a challenge for you or do they "not" tell you about meetings that you should be a part of? Once you've identified their pattern, you can then be proactive in making sure you're doing things that keep you a few steps ahead. This strategy will help decrease the high level of stress and frustration you feel; and will keep you focused on your goals. When you can expect and anticipate for a person to be who they truly are, you can train your mind and body (psychosomatic response) to withstand being adversely affected by their actions.

We can't control other people! Let that marinate for a minute.....We can only control ourselves and how we react to the the things that they say and do. Think about what "you" want to accomplish professionally and put your primary focus on strategizing your way to that goal. You can achieve a respectful, cordial work relationship with someone you can't stand, for the greater good. That "good" being YOU and what YOU want, until YOU elevate to your next professional level. If you hit a brick wall, start going sideways until you reach an opening, or simply climb over that wall, if possible and necessary. Create your own sanctuary within your mind, cubicle, office, counter, assembly line, or where ever. Remember. Your current position is a stepping stone to your ultimate goal and no one has the power to take your goal from you. That is, unless you relinquish it.